Wednesday, February 28, 2018

Ummmm, Yes (Relapse)

The digestive system returned to day one, almost. I walked around outdoors inspecting parks today and had to use a less than clean bathroom and luckily was wearing a poopy pad. Minimal diarrhea, mucous, and blood. I definitly should find a doctor. I tried yesterday, couldn't be seen. Modern medicine the Henry Ford way. Anyway, I walked almost eight thousand steps (I wear a step counter for a contest at work, did I mention that somewhere along the way?). Frustrated, hungry too, I pigged out after a long (11 hours) active work day. An hour later, bloat, just bloat. Hopefully I won't explode in the middle of the night. Where did I put that diaper, anyway?

Tuesday, February 27, 2018


Yesterday was almost normal. Today, different. Multiple soft but not liquid poops yesterday eating a burger and clams and rice and today, oatmeal for breakfast and a eggplant panini for lunch and then, soft poop an then, home and two liquid poops like the kind that went on most of two weeks. So I drank more probiotic and then ate a rice meal and some ginger ale and so far, so good. The queasy bloat is definitely back though, even though I was 205 pounds before I ate the rice bowl. So the weight continues to drop and the "cure" did not quite take so I really should get to a doctor. I went to one today, but a misunderstanding about appointment dates and I could not be seen, so I tried. I got the car tune-up instead. So if I die, at least the car is healthy. I can save money being buried in it.

What, you want me to be sad? lol :)

Narf :)

Sunday, February 25, 2018

The Intestinal Saga Continues

Hours of research went somewhere b the wayside in the development of this article which is more babbling and distraction than anything else, but if you know and love me as I do, you feel it's all worth it and we can cuddle in front of our favorite movies or TV shows later. For now, here's the story we've all be waiting for while we were sleeping.

Yesterday, for various reasons, I drank 20 ounces of Kevita Master Brew Kombucha Tart Cherry drink. Today I drank 13.5 ounces of Suja Organic Probiotic Apple Cider Vinegar Peace Ginger Juice drink. It has been a rough couple of weeks for this body.

Still, for a body that can be considered that of a sick old man, I played 9 softball games and hit and ran and pitched very well, 3-3 with a walk today 3-3 with a walk on Friday, a triple and a double and scoring six times along the way. I stayed awake all night twice (hey, once to do laundry, so it's not just frivolous irresponsibility, m'ok? lol lam laa) and have been active every day, though not as much as usual and working out, every day since the start of this intestinal upheaval. Others I know would have gone to the emergency room (at least one has). I am the oldest of all the friends I know and also one of the most active.

Still, the years are taking their toll on me, this body speaks. The guy living inside of me can really be an asshole sometimes, but he's done a lot of things right along the way I think because I am still running around with the kids a few times a week playing ball. If I couldn't keep up, they'd not want me playing and I'd gracefully retire to a senior league.

Anyway, the universe seems to provide the opportunities. For instance, Helen asked for dinner at a fried fish place and after that, on the way back here, I was talking to Harpo and missed the exit and 500 feet on the right was a Target where I stopped for a couple of things I wanted to try... anything with ginger and probiotics in it. They didn't have pill-form ginger and the pill-form probiotics were more than $15 a bottle and I rarely buy new food supplements without researched, so I continued wandering the store and found ginger tea and then, by accident, found some probiotic drinks in the cold food case. Selection was skimpy, but I bought four bottles of different stuff at under $3.00 a bottle and whether psychologically or physically, I think they may be helping. Falling asleep in this chair before showering after softball and then rolling into bed and not waking for eight hours seems to have helped as well. So much for clean sheets. The first day, stank.

Anyway, mostly the body is cared for as much as possible in this disgustingly unhealthy living environment. I just drank 4,000,000,000 (yes, four billion) active alive bacteria, after all. Tasted so bad. Medicine.

Maybe I should return to the normal routine of vitamins and other supplements I've been taking for years now. I stopped two weeks ago when what I thought was food poisoning hit. Maybe I am babbling and procrastinating too much. No primary doctor doesn't help. No one outside of this body caring enough to know and intervene with even a conversation or acknowledgment doesn't help. I should not say no one, there is she who must not be named who did respond, after all. Try to keep a sense of humor, try to color between the lines, try to do what everybody wants, try to believe it all will be fine.

So maybe I learned even more than I've forgotten today.

Burping optional.

Narf :)

Saturday, February 24, 2018

Always Another Obstacle

This body simply rejects being under 200 pounds. Whenever I point it in that direction, bam, it throws another obstacle in my path. Perhaps you noticed it complaining in the previous entry. Perhaps I should have called this blog Me and This Body or This Body I Loosely Call Mine but whatever, for the sake of indulging it, let's take a look at common causes of prolonged diarrhea according to this website:

Viral or bacterial infections - Maybe
Food poisoning - Most Likely
Taking antibiotics - Yup
Anxiety and/or stress - Yup

I did not become fully aware that food poisoning could last so long. What's this about diarrhea for four weeks?

So I've been drinking plenty of fluids, though not replacing electrolytes too much because my reaction to the food poisoning symptoms was to fast for three days and then pig out for two days while playing in a softball tournament (certainly re-stocked the body on everything good and bad) and then semi-fast for five days (under 500 calorie daily diet). None of that seems to have worked and here we are entering day eleven and the lack of sphincter control has me a bit more than a bit more concerned.

So last night after 4:00 AM I caved in and made a run for the border. I said no to the hot dogs in bagels and fried chicken nuggets Sarducci offered while we were playing cards and games last night. But noooooo, circumstances pushed the emotional eating madness out from under the rock that was holding it down and fast food american mexican grabbed me and stuff a gazillion calories down my throat.

I actually ran right past the board, knocked down any warning signs that may have been there, and I woke up in a Mexican prison with explosive diarrhea. I'll spare you any further gory details (or photos) and just complain about having to clean the cracks and crevices of cheap modern plastic toilet seat joints after being awake for 24 hours and feeling bloated as ever.

Ever get to the point where you have had messy diarrhea for so long that you are walking through your day can't tell if you've got all the stink off?

Aherm, anyway... like whatever.

The latest obstacle to losing the weight I've been wanting and needing to lose for since packing it on for the past 12 months is this persistent diarrhea. Is there a contest for how many times a blog post contains the word diarrhea? Does diarrhea go away if it is repeated often enough or is that just a way to reduce the stigma and/or drive readers away. I didn't include graphics or photos, after all.


Actually, that's not me. I had no nausea or vomiting. Just the explosive diarrhea x10 days. I will try to remember to buy ginger ale when I go out to meet Helen for dinner at a greasy fried fish hole-in-the-wall in a few hours. Hey, we only live once. The trouble is, we only die once too. At least as far as we know.

Helen just texted. She said she is bring me bagels. Just when I am cutting out breads and carbs and extra calories. What was I saying about obstacles? The universe really does not want me to lose this weight.

I think I should stay in touch with the body these days.

Narf. (no barf :)

Friday, February 23, 2018

Food Poisoning and More

This actually started with this entry and continues for the next few months, I mean, if you want to follow the whole story (actually the little bits and pieces I record here in this blog when I remember this blog exists because I stop ignoring the body talk). C.Diff is a bitch.

Last Tuesday night, really Wednesday midnight-ish, I was struck by the worst food poisoning I've experienced in many many year. The cast iron gut collapsed and died. Maybe it was the antibiotic I pushed the five days before, but the infected leg needed that. Anyway, I did not want food Wednesday or Thursday and Friday I ate light, a Wawa rice bowl and some oatmeal, until dinner when I ate a bacon cheeseburger. Saturday I played a softball tournament and felt fine, weak and tired, but fine. Hungry enough for two lunches at the Village Inn, then a later dinner of many foods at a German restaurant Saturday night. Sunday I had a breakfast wrap from Wawa and decided it was time to rest the gut and drop some eight so since then, next to nada.

No appetite, bloat, and major pressing diarrhea.

Yes, so no appetite last week due to the food poisoning. The appetite was back on Friday and Saturday and Sunday, but gone since I've been back here. The diarrhea was gone Friday and Saturday and Sunday, but back since I've been back here and I am barely putting anything into the system to come out, yet I can barely hold in the liquid after eating or drinking. All week I've had two packets of instant oatmeal, a Muscle Milk eat day (two on Tuesday, but that's all I had), and a can of chicken Wednesday, Thursday, and just finishing a second can today. Today is the most I ate all week. I'm forcing it in, no appetite and feeling bloated. I'll have a muscle milk before softball.

I am ruling out the flu because I don't have a fever and felt good enough to play (well) six games of softball over the weekend, four on Saturday and two on Sunday with less than 6 hours sleep each night. I haven't had any antibiotics since last week. With less than 500 calories a day for 5 straight days, I should be losing bloat, but I feel as bloated as ever and the belt agrees.

And no appetite.

So what is it? A psychological reaction (or over-reaction) to being back here in this unhealthy living environment? Some sort of parasite or disease of the gut? Kidneys? (they don't feel great and the kidney doctor wants me to go for re-tests on my blood work next week, so what's up with that? The Nurse who called gave no suggestion of checking anything specific and said the Kidney levels were great, better than 6 months ago. Something else in the lab work they are not mentioning? I must get a copy of the results to see for myself. I also must renew the BP meds. Hopefully he will do both if I ask nicely.

Of course I need a primary care doctor to coordinate all the specialists, but the earliest appointment I could get was for May. The past few years, primary care doctors seem scarce and by the time the appointment comes around, I forget and have to start the search for one all over. I want to interview a doctor who I am going to trust with my life and primary care, but the system is not set up for the patient's needs. So I go begging for a BP med refill each year and pay more than I should for a prescription. The American system of medical care is an assembly line industry that, by design or lack of concern, aides in a person's death much more than it keeps a person in a good quality of life.

Wa wa wah, and all that jazz.

Softball in a couple of hours, time to head out and pick up more nutrient drinks and hope I don't crap my pants on the field. Life for this body is a challenging experience these days.

So how are you?

Narf :)

Saturday, February 3, 2018

Record of My Destruction

This blog is just that, a record of my self-destruction. I may be closing in on 230 pounds. Maybe if I came here more often and confronted myself in words with the reality of my choices... but my choices is not to come here and that is one more pieces of proof, proof by omission. Maintaining contact when unpleased and sometimes disgusted with the reality ain't easy. I knew that that from the start... eleven years ago (oh my, and how the memories flood back after following some linkage... was it good for you?). And the left neck suddenly cramps for the first time in weeks. The body is extremely stressed tonight. Fatigue started it. Then a nap not long enough and softball unprepared that killed morale because I played so poorly and let myself get injured. I can not sit comfortably, yet here I am. Sitting. I must keep my leg elevated.

This is not as bad as the broken ankle, but it is the second worst pain I've known in the past twenty years. It really hurts (immediate swelling and discoloration at the site of impact and within an hour swelling and pain around to the calf. Definitely not good). I was wearing shin pads, it probably would have broken the bone if I wasn't. Hopefully there is no break and there will be no infection and there will be no blood clot stopping the heart or stroking the brain.

Did I mention I started another blog to prove I am suicidal?

It hurts.