Sunday, November 27, 2016

Poorly Feeling

Enough so that I am here recording the physical experience in this body for posterity. In case it matters. In case I don't make it. We are feeling as poorly as I have felt in many years, I think. The mind blocks the worst experience in this life from time to time, especially when the body needs rest and healing, so perhaps this is merely the worst head cold I've felt in many heads. It has been building for the past week and presently, the sinuses wish explosion was an option. A relatively no stop flow of thin clearish mucous keeps me putting paper towel to my nose as gently as possible because I have no tissues and do not want to look like bozo the clown, especially not with an interview later this week. Hopefully I am all better for that. The throat soreness is increasing. The body feels chilled (the temperature was 97.4 at the last check-up, though I my thermometer is packed away somewhere in the storage boxes for now). The thought of mold and whether this is a reaction to being exposed to it in this environment raises a valid point in the mind as there is amply evidence of a serious mold growth in this space and I spent much more time in this environment in the past week and the heating system was turned on for the first time about a week ago... Research just leaves me feeling worse, not to mention whiny and ungrateful).

So I showered, but for some reason the hot water did not feel even close to hot this afternoon and no one has used the water for at least three or four hours. Just when I needed a seriously hot steamy sinus clearing body challenging scorcher too. So I sit wrapped in my big red robe and that warms the body a bit. It is time to search the storage for slippers not only for foot warmth, but in case the mold is throughout the carpet which is very likely. I drank chocolate milk this week, a half gallon (almost, there is a little left) and also cheese and the dairy may have contributed to the mucous. So many possibilities, but the feeling is the same. Sick. Yucky. Blah.

The question of when the exercise so often recommended by every good sense in the head waves hello and I wave back as if I take it seriously, but I act more like the happy idiot slowly (or rapidly) vegetating into the aging process. Now that softball is on hiatus for almost two months... hopefully I will stop being stupidly lazy and get out for some walk/runs and more, even though the anemia has the doctor recommending no exertion. These days, more and more, the body feels trapped, or perhaps the body feels like a trap to the mind. Is this all there is to growing old?

Positivity is not easily maintained when feeling poorly.

Try harder :)

Monday, November 7, 2016

Bumps Along the Road to Optimal Health

As I type, the armpits distract the mind with burning pain, especially the left one. I showered and put on deodorant. Is it the deodorant I put on after the shower I had a couple of hours ago? Is it the extra deodorant I put on just ten minutes ago? I think maybe the latter and yet, the deodorant is not new and has not had this sort of reaction before. Is it the fungal infection the body has been fighting for months reacting to the deodorant? Perhaps as the anal irritation has returned as well, but there are other likely causes for that.

And the anal pain and bleeding continues to increase.

This is likely due to a few factors we can explore for the record and for any doctor who might care for me now or anytime.

- The stress of the move both physically in labor and emotionally in excitement and uncertainty and trepidation of health risks in the new living space.

- The high level of mold and final growth in the new space has and the uncleanliness have the body and mind even more stressed physically.

- The food intake... more per day than in the previous month or more and more calories per day and more meats and fats and carbs and in the past four days, more simple sugars.

- The health supplements... none of the supplements to aid digestion except Cinnamon and Chromium. No daily Apple Cider Vinegar, Raw Potato Starch, Activia Yogurt, Fruit (Apples), Veggies (Carrots),

- Adjusting to pooping in a new and very unclean space.

The effects are larger and more painful poops that result in anal stretching that tears something that bleeds. I suspect hemorrhoids but it could be anal fissures, tumors, or worse. Not knowing and not having health insurance for the tests I should have produce extreme stress.

So I spent more than $50 on treatments.

- More P-H suppositories.

- Over the counter anti-fungal cream (two different kinds).

- Laxative pills.

- Fleet Glycerin Suppositories

Then I did some research and found that Glycerin can feed fungus because it is an alcohol based sugar so I may return that and stay with prune juice or laxative pills when I need a laxative. This is the first time all year I considered using one other than the Glycerin and that was just to lubricate for comfort not for constipation. As long as I eat a balanced diet (not 95% meat, limited red meat) and consistently consume the supplements (Apple cider vinegar, raw potato starch, an Activia or other probiotic a few times a week, all is well inside - it's the anus that pains me).

The cream the doctor prescribed, Nystatin 100,000 Units, was only available through a prescription and the various active ingredients in the OTC anti-fungal creams are several different chemicals that are not well differentiated in literature and not reviewed well for consumer use which makes choosing the right one for me much more challenging than it should be. There appears to be little or no consensus on several key questions. Ultimately I have one question - what is the best-safest OTC anti-fungal cream that can be used on or even in the anus?

Don't all answer at once now :)

Tomorrow I must get Activia and prune juice and start consuming some apple cider vinegar and raw potato flour daily again as that was helping reduce the appetite and weight and stool size and overall health was improving. I also must consider visiting the free clinic again on Tuesday morning and letting a doctor look up my ass more closely and find out if a colonoscopy is possible now that my symptoms are continuing for months and getting more serious. Yes. I must figure out how to get tests that could reduce my stress and keep me alive longer.

What a drag it is...

Yeah, older.

Narf :)