out of touch

and suddenly today i see i have factors including rushing, not preparing properly, being distracting, being frustrated and isolated, and poor field conditions - i hurt my pitching arm... the biceps specifically... and i shook it off and continued pitching and throwing, even playing third base when asked a week later and and the week after that too... and pitching in a second consecutive tournament the following week... that (because i twist the arm and wrist a lot when i pitch) and especially throwing to first from third base really aggravated the injury... then this past friday night i pitched three games and had to make fast throws to first a lot...

it comes as no surprise... really...

even the 5k i ran yesterday did not do the healing process much good and i am hoping it did not hurt the biceps more... even the typing of these words... i am wondering if this is hurting the biceps more... moving the right arm as little as possible...

so now i sit here very frustrated because i have decided not to pitch in today's game... and i am considering not swinging the bat as well... a few days ago, before pitching three games just two days ago, i was considering skipping the pitching and being the designated hitter, but now i am considering taking myself out of the lineup completely... that has me very frustrated... i will make the decision at game time later...

stop being so out of touch with the body... please...