what?

here i am again and my first thought was that i haven't been here in a while and i see i was here yesterday and that may be a sign of being overworked out of touch and losing my mind (as if it ever was all mind in the first place, as if it could be anybody else's, as if my self-mockery isn't thinly disguised arrogance, or perhaps the insecurity and helpless whining is the facade that keeps me amused {and alone} while i am waiting for the one cha cha cha) and doggonit, tired...

lately the neck, upper and lower, has been paining kind of naggingly enough to have a queasy stomach at times and even a frontal lobe headache now and then and did i the occasional foot cramps... fatigue, definitely, but i wonder what else... core muscle weakness, probably, but else?... eating one meal a day late at night and sleeping uncomfortably in a recliner or lumpy bed covered in dirty laundry?... likely... too much time sitting at a computer staring at a screen typing and moving a mouse?... ding ding ding, i think we have a winner... though the other things too...

like, ummm, maybe blood pressure (did i say that?)...

and yet, the mind and heart and core me wants to write and share even if the body cannot keep up with it... help me if you can i'm feeling down, la la la la.... so how are you? :}