yeah, right

so after dropping a bit of revealing connection type information here for the offering for those who care enough to explore beyond the body thoughts, i chose to push through the abdominal distress and play softball (running hard, hitting well, pitching even better, yay) and then fast food frenzy the body tonight, including the mountain dew... so far, the body is not screaming in rebellion (if we do not count the ear ringing that warns of the blood pressure which is definitely high after the fast food and sugar-caffiene rush), but the wisdom behind the impulse knows better...

still, it turns me on (the physical pleasures of life, that is)... i so relate to the messenger character in city of angels even if the body thinks that just might be suicidal thinking... loving the hedonistic life for as long as it lasts...

and how are you? :)

hiccups

last week i suddenly without planning changed dietary paths back to serious veggie light cutting out soda caffeine sugar fat and all the processed stuff i was eating so much of (and i haven't had italian or anything outside either) and i dropped more than ten pounds to see 199 on the scale one the bottom-out morning... the body is about 203 at the moment as i pigged out on late night veggies with sauces the past two nights, but still on the way down and hopefully will see the 170s by the end of the year again... at least the low 180s... still having too much fun to take the lean mean fighting machine seriously though (but the teenage dream is not gone either, cha know :)

gym at midnight

running on caffeine and adrenaline, only 3-4 hours sleep and still, made it to the gym around midnight and the body loved it, even if the heart gives out tomorrow, it felt fantastic tonight... and without a lover, after all, what pleasure can i experience... masturbation, exercise, creative play, and food...

meet me at the gym at midnight :)

face stuffing is a full time job

yeah, it is, you know it if you've ever done it... and delicious can be found everywhere, so unless i go nowhere and say no to everything, i continue to bloat enough to not drop under 200 pounds... but i've got a couple of weeks before the imaginary deadline and sort-of promise i made myself by telling someone else i agree to do it... and besides, the body feels much better not bloated, so why in the world would i continue trading a few minutes of oral ecstasy for twenty four hours of bloat each day... rhetorical, of course... get real...

hedonism is fun

the pattern continues, i mean, the pattern of careless fun with some measure of disregard for the body just continues and i am enjoying the heck out of it on so many levels... busy with work so much that i skip lunch just to get the work done and get out at a reasonable hour... busy with fun and games after work, softball, game nights, dinners and movies and such, so there is no time to even think about anything deeper than the fun of the moment, no less feel anything other than the fun of the moment, and assorted sundries... so the bloat remains, rising and falling with whim and weather... and the body ages faster than it has to, even though it is still at a rate slower than the average human norm... and does anybody care?... maybe, but not close enough to have any real influence... let's face it, hedonism is fun...

sigh :}

forgetting again

it's like i have selective alsheimer's or something, or perhaps it's just selective amnesia, but i am back to accepting laziness and bloating on food and too much sugar and fats and carbs and so on and so forth and being all buddha belly... it's like i am deliberately indulging my taste buds and other sensory stimulus because nobody else is around to share or care... in fact, that is what i am doing, cuz the physical experience is so much fun... but does that keep me from attracting someone who is attractive to me?... seems so, but then, what do i know...

duh...

aches and bloats

all this farting around about taking care of me has me hurting and feeling neglected and lonelier than ever... yeah, it's me, the body... i don't get to talk nearly as much as i should given the title of this blog, but i sneak a few words in past the babbler and mind-people when nobody is looking in the wee hours, usually after i get put to bed right after dinner cuz i am begging so hard for the extra rest... i really need to find better ways to get what i need...

yes, bodies have needs and i know how the mind-people hate the word and the concept, except maybe when it comes to a good love song or some really fine milk chocolate, wait, the latter is me too, but that's besides the point (oh no, i'm not sure if i am a babbling body or if the babbler is taking over... can a body have an out of body experience?...

ahem... the costocondritis thing still tears into my chest when i sneeze or cough, so i try not to but the mind-people cannot always control me... i've been able to play softball with less pain and i think the pills are helping a lot... some long chemical name starting with g and a half dozen other herbal-type pills (i trust the mind-people to keep track of that stuff, i mean, as much as i complain about them sometimes, they have kept me alive and kicking {and kicking hard} for a long time) are helping a lot...

i am still quite bloated most of the time though... eating too much in one sitting does that... and eating too much of the fattening stuff... though it tastes so good... not enough exercise, for sure, cuz even though i play softball several times a week, i do not actually work out as much playing softball as i did going to the gym... the aerobics are much less and the duration of intensity is much less and i do hope i get dragged to the gym soon and more often...

what about right now?... aches and bloats and costo-whatever?... good excuses... there's always hope, right?... yeah, i remember how to throw the mind-people's words back at them... nyuk and all... hopefully next time i find myself at the keyboard i'll be less achy and less bloated... all in all, it's been a great life for a body... lonelier than i'd like, especially recently, but still a great life...

hope your mind-people gave you one too :)